To do lists...

and I have a love/hate relationship.

I love to make them when I get to fill them with fun things. Things like ingredients for a recipe I'm trying for the first time, projects/crafts I'd like to tackle, people I need to call and have a nice long chat with, read Habakkuk/Minor Prophets commentary before Friday, etc.

Here comes the hate part. I do not like to put on my list the things that cause stress. Normal. Who wants to think about or even document the things that stress them out. For instance, while my semester is done on Thursday, I have 4 papers to write, two days at my internship complete, 5 discussion comments to make on blackboard, and various other field forms to fill out. My insides are trembling. To heighten the stress, my sinuses have decided to continue to wage the war they started at the beginning of the semester.

But by Thursday at 4pm I will be on a plane to San Diego. God willing, everything that needs to get done will get done.

Looking over this list, I am heavily reminded of my finitude and even my depravity.
I am reminded that, while this list seems unconquerable, Christ conquered the world. He will get me through this or show me how to deal if I don't.

So I praise the Lord. For He is good. He is good to His unproductive, unmotivated children.

Remember, Remember the 19th of November

In 9 days Miss HMO is coming to visit me in Chi-Town and I could not be more excited. Heather and I went to Biola together, had classes together, lived in the same dorm, played pranks together, did ministry together.... I could go on and relive my past joys but I'd rather tell you about future delights!!

I have so many good things planned for us to do and see. Great eats, improv, museums, parks, coffee from local micro-roasting companies and of course we cannot forget watching the midnight showing of Harry Potter & the Deathly Hallows Part I!!!

I can fairly say that we are equally soooooo excited to be seeing this together. We are both huge fans, Heather actually having visited the HP theme park at Universal Studios this past summer and myself attempting to make recipes from the books (Don't ever try to make or consume Butterbeer, it's better left in fiction). In preparation I re-read the entire series this past summer in a span of about 3 weeks. That's a book every three days. NBD. I first began the series when I was in 7th grade, 11 years ago. Harry Potter has been an important thread in my life during such formative years and while I am filled with anticipation for the movie, I will be very sad when Part II comes out. It will be the end of an era.

image taken from bookshelf porn

Heather means so much to me and I am so excited/honored to share this with her. I am excited to spend 5 days with her, showing her my life in Chicago. I am excited to catch up with her, live life for a couple of days together, pray to God with her and hope for the future in her company.

Is God a God of blessings or what? Just thinking about this brings me so much joy. Thank you Jesus for lavishing us with grace and knowing that our souls need fellowship and communion with You & dear friends.

So here's to Heather's arrival in NINE days! HUZZAH!

Whimsy.for.today.

via bookshelfporn


I am in LOVE

As Bob would say,

The times they are a-changin'.
Since I got back to Chicago and up until yesterday, the weather was unbearable (at least to this spoiled southern Californian). High 80-90s with 80% or more humidity. You never stop sweating. GROSSSS.

But yesterday, yesterday temps were in the 60s!!
Wind was whipping at your ankles. Delicious.


And for me, the one who sweats, I was feeling like life was being poured back into my veins. I love crisp weather. I love not feeling over-heated. I love a cold reason for a good hot vanilla latte with an added shot of espresso.

The suddenness in this change of weather caught me off guard. I'm a Southern Californian, we have good weather and great weather allllll year long!!

This sudden change made me aware of how God works with our souls, with our hearts. Once we had hearts of stone and God gave us hearts of flesh (Ez 11:19). Once we were without God's word and then he wrote it on our hearts (Jer 31:33). Sometimes his process of sanctifying our souls can take a lifetime and sometimes he works at light speed (which I'm sure, for him, is still slower than a turtle) When I got back to Chicago a couple of weeks ago, after being in California for almost four months, my heart was not in a good place. I wanted to be back with my family, my friends and the comfort & convenience of the summer. I was depressed and dreading so many aspects of Chicago life as a student. I asked God to change my heart, for even the regenerate need to practice confession and ask for renewal (Ps 51). God desires for us to be conformed to his will in both word and deed. He sent his son, gave us a heart of flesh, wrote his word on our hearts, and sent us a helper (Jn 14:26) so that we might be able to acknowledge his will and love being included in it.

I asked God to change my heart. To take away the longing for what I did not have and make me grateful for where he had me and what he had/has in store for me.

He's done it, he changed my heart. No circumstances in this scenario changed. I'm still in Chicago, still thousands of miles from home. I don't want to make this sound like some cheap infomercial, like for laser hair removal. "Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow!!"
1. Because God does not work for 2 Easy Payments of $39.95 + S&H
2. Because God does not work under quid pro quo terms
3. Because a heart change is a much more complex, intimate & vulnerable process than some cheap transaction that isn't in fact 100% guaranteed to work.
4. Because a true heart change can not be accomplished by fallen human means but is a supernatural matter.

Writing about this desired heart change in the same post that contains the knowledge that God did in fact answer my prayer and provided what he knew I needed feels in some ways too quick & dirty.


We live in a society that devours tension, withholding natures, hype and the build up that we hope will lead to a favorable peak. We go to movies to see this process. The best movies have each of these elements in dynamic proportions.

At the same time we live in a society that also survives on instant gratification. We Americans are the Veruca Salts of the world.

I could have written about my depressed state, written about my sinful longing of what I didn't have and discontent with what was right in front of me. Could have made you longingly wait for God to act.... Will he do it?... Will he?


But that presents what I think is trust issue. We must believe that God will do what he tells us he will do. We must take heed to his word and place our lives in the reliability of his character and promises. Even when the day is dismal and only further darkness is in sight, we must know that he is faithful (Rom. 8:18-30).

Just as sure as the changing of seasons and the sometimes suddenness with which they come, so is there assurance that God will move. Pay attention, chances are he's already at work.

NEAT!

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They’re also having a special limited-time sale on their Mac and PC base packages and upgrades. Check it out!

Noon Time Chicago Sublime

I'm back. In denial that I'm really here. Desperately wanting California or air conditioning. Either will do.
Here is some visual goodness to motivate your day. Whether you're just beginning it, in the middle, or nearing the end. It's always nice to look at something pretty.

What do shadows do to you? Do you even notice them? Their design?
Shadows do good things to me.

Look to the shadows today. You may find something beautiful.

Summertime in the Golden State

About a week ago I re-booked my plane ticket back to Chicago.
Originally I was to fly back on July 23rd. A day after my mom-sicle's birthday.

HOWEVER, after much thought I decided I wasn't done with my time in SoCal and thus decided to stay a month longer!

This way I get to spend more time with these two:

My little brother Chris and my sister Priscilla

and

Jill Maag Shaffer & my sister Beth: The best hiking partners.

and of course

Heather Marie Olson, HMO, Heezy, Hezekiah, Hezekiel

I get more great talks with

Sam Price-Horn (who always giggles when I say her name that way)

and adventures with these ladies

Theresa, Kari, Angelina & Emily
We all look alike because we're related.

perhaps some theological or harry potter related conversations with this guy

Johnny Pepper Dunne
Bummer Marisa Lauren Casias is in NorCal and cannot join in.

I love that I get to continue to go on long walks while engaging in delicious conversation with this beauty

my sister, Ericka Perryman, who will one day rule the world.


All these friends and more make leaving California very difficult.